Amazing, isn't it? the performance is really terrible in that engine in these scenarios. I also don't get it. Why on earth would ANYONE want to fetch a graph with lazy loading. It's the most silly way of fetching a graph if you know up front which elements you need to fetch per node!
Also the excuse of the joins getting too complex is moot. Sure if you join another node to it it will become a big resultset, but that thus means you are on the wrong track and have to use a different fetch strategy. Apparently they don't want to do that, which is IMHO silly, because now they advertise as if they can fetch graphs efficiently, but that's a lie: most graphs will be terribly inefficient and people will only find out at runtime.
But... I shouldn't complain